One of the fun things about having a husband, many male friends, and coworkers is hearing unfiltered commentary on my outfits and those of the women we see around town. I know I'm probably not alone in my opinion that guys can be downright catty!
That said, some of their observations are quite entertaining or serve as food for thought when creating an outfit. Here are some of my favorite gems from recent conversations, which I've been keeping saved in the notepad app on my phone.
"Dress for where we're going, please. I am not paying for a cab."
One of the top complaints I've heard (which I may or may not have been guilty of in the past) is when ladies are so dead set on wearing the outfit we planned that we forget that it's not exactly practical. For example, wearing uncomfortable heels on a night out when we'll be walking many blocks or, god forbid, to a concert. (For the record, I have never been that delusional)
"Of course I like to look at boobs, but I don't want anyone looking at my girlfriend like that."
This one made me laugh because it seems like such a hypocritical statement, though I do see his point a little bit. Thin, low cut tops are all over the racks, and provide everyone with a pretty good look at what you've been blessed with. Some guys would rather keep that a private show.
"Pink Cowboys jerseys are a travesty, and those shirts with the Rangers logo cut off look trashy."
To many Texas guys, thou shalt never mess around with the red/white/blue of the sports team logos. While people watching at a recent Rangers game, I learned from my companions that a basic fitted tee that does not look like it was attacked with scissors or a bedazzler is by far the best choice for attracting positive attention in your section.
And a few more that I don't have time to illustrate, but made me giggle:
"Not everyone has thigh tops fit to be seen."
"This not matching that you do... is that a thing?"
"Why do you wear leopard shoes all the time? Is that style?"
"Do they think that we have never seen skin before? I know that humans are not naturally orange."
"If her skirt is so short that I'm waiting to catch a glimpse of ass, I remind myself that she wants more attention than I could ever provide."
"If there was time to put on a pound of makeup and curl her hair, the 'I rolled out of bed like this' charade is over. That means there was time to put on real pants to ride the airplane and she chose not to."
Have the rest of you heard some great observations lately? Share them in the comments!
P.S. For the record, I think women should wear whatever the heck they want without trying to impress men, but I'm sharing this because I find it funny. Hopefully you do, too.
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